One of the best ways is to offer effective apologies. Things have gone a fair way beyond ideal but you aren't a silly school girl after your first taste of wine. I work in hospitality, so I can't change departments, but I can change my shift pattern. If I could go back in time I would because my SO is truly the best person out there. In fact, you dont even have to tell your partner what you did because it was an innocent kiss. My gf went to a house party and got really drunk, and apparently kissed a g My girlfriend got drunk and kissed another guy, 2 months later she got drunk and kissed a girl, HELP. Hi Scope! Again I could go on with this subject,and I undoubtedly will. Changing jobs or departments and without delay, those things that aren't rocket science, is definitely what I as a fractionally betrayed partner would call you putting your rueful money where your rueful mouth is - enough to help reassure permanently. I recall an incident years ago, we were very young, just teenagers, and a girl planted a big kiss on my hubby (then boyfriend) on a night out. If you kissed a stranger, your significant other might just react by laughing or by telling you it's okay. You have a number of choices in terms of how to deal with what happened. :-) I mean, *I* don't mind if your relationship continues slowly but surely remaining on the skids, do I. Alcohol was a factor, but all it did was bring to the surface the feelings that were already there. I sent the guy packing with a friendly piss-take (whilst deliberately flashing my ring), and then told hubbie the minute I got home. He deserves the right to make the decision on whether he can forgive you and move on with you. Make lemonade out of them. What should I do. He Have Lipstick Stain Or Make Up Stain On His Face It's an obvious sign that someone kissed him. They say don't tell the wife or husband about the infidelity, because it would cause more hurt. When I needed a dresser picked up from a furniture store, he offered to take me to the store and bring the furniture home in his pick up truck. I've been cheated on just recently and I cannot imagine how awful it would be if he didn't own up and tell me. I guess kissing another when married, with or without the other knowing about it is a sore subject. 2. Like stateside, maybe southern California or San Diego? I think my husband could maybe forgive the kiss, but the doubt would be there, he would wonder if this could happen again, and he would be so hurt. I reassured my husband that this would never happen again and that I was sorry. It sounds like you are projecting your own fears onto him. Lees theory has a big vulnerability. Would they be as lenient? You werent totally bombed out of your mind, so you realized what you did and you felt guilty about it. It was important to hear the argument for doing what is right. It's not that big of a deal anyway and you aren't going to do it again. this guy only tried to kiss you so as far as you cheating on him there is no and your appropriate response was toback away and leave the guy standing. We were chatting when we realised the other woman was snoring. It was a real dress up affair, and the drink flowed freely all night long. She had gone to bed. We kissed for maybe 5 minutes, or maybe less, I don't know. Tell your husband. I had only taken three years of piano lessons while still a teenager, and here I was in my late 40s studying piano again. And yes I do still believe either directly or indirectly, mouth to mouth, tongue swapping French kissing caressing lead to sex. Even if it is innocent kiss, I am done. Free weekly email, Insta, and more - > https://linktr.ee/monogamish_me. He left and went to the lake. As far as crossed purposes,hmmmmmmmm not following you. Houston, we have a problem. For me, to feel guilty about having sex with someone, while in a relationship with someone else, I must have remorse. Mr S lived there once (San Fransisco), but he hasn't any urge to return, either. The video shows twogayguys(fellow vloggers Jordan Jayro and James Butler) partner with four straight men togive them their first man-to-mansnog. We were going through an awkward time in the relationship and I was craving the attention and simplicity of this guy. The moment feelings are involved then youve cheated. I was enjoying myself and loving the chats and laughs. It's South of France for us this year, holiday-wise, and then in about a year-and-a-half's time we're off permanently to Espana (por favor). Even despite it included you having to become whatever degree of a low-down doity adulterer. Are you sure all you did was kiss? My husband wasnt home at the time. However from what I've read passionate kissing lead to touching, petting,etc. See what she has to say. If you want to know the why's, you're going to have to be willing to hear the darkest part of what makes me, ME. I know it was wrong and I regret it all. That left just me, the man and another woman. I feel like my husband deserves so much better, but can't tell him because the guy isn't some stranger, he's a person I see 5 days a week, and I know if tables were turned and I was in my husbands position I would wonder what interactions were happening between the two in work everyday. As I left, the boy who I kissed came with me and I tried my best to shrug him off. I kissed another man four years ago. Amazing how long this subject has carried on. I said to my husband, I have something to tell you, but I dont know how to say it.. The marriage itself trying to keep his father and the community happy, and just get my husband to consider the rest of the job force he worked in and the many his wants would affect with UAW seniority for a big three auto plant. All of sudden my guy friend stopped texting me good morning and good night Im a guy and i had sex with my guy bestfriend drunk. :-*. I wish I told my wife, but she found out because in my browsing history I had searched should I tell my wife I kissed a girl when drunk. What you *can* have is the Biggest B*lls on the Block award. I felt disorientated. This should be obvious, but sadly, for many it's not. Have a happy day every one. Alcohol does not change that fact. It ended up leading to a follow-up video of straight girls kissing other girls for the first time. Im more than competent at the piano myself, but this guy was amazing. Generally people dont care when it happens with others but when it happens with them, they may react very differently because human are emotional creatures. Actually I really don't have any experience at all. I'm mortified. I went out for drinks in town last night and got extremely drunk and kissed another man, it only lasted not even a few seconds but I feel so so so guilty and wish I could take it back. I immediately felt totally ashamed after it happened and left the party. That was crazy' and other awkward things. I'm going to keep my distance from my work colleague and I'm going to ensure nothing like this ever happens again. Knowing what you value will help you build the most meaningful life possible. I myself have had issues in the past months but I won't elaborate. Either way, I've noted your comments, I've already decided what I am going to do, and I'll deal with the consequences, whatever they might be. Don't hurt him any more than you already have. He went on to tell me that he kissed another woman and he had to tell me, he couldn't keep it a secret from me. I have posted a vent and been waiting for your scathing reply. But we have spoken since about it a lot. I'm disgusted with myself to think I would do that after just the tiniest bit of attention and flattery. Hello, TheBestAdvice: Im glad you thought my post was intelligent and that you could relate to it. When you feel guilty for hurting someone you love, holding in those feelings makes it worse. ;-)). You'll have to accept it, face up to it, and put it behind you. Bad things happen.Yes.but wat i d recomnd u is NEVER EVER tell him ! Allow me show you for future ref what someone who hates feeling guilty looks like: There's a difference between sex and kissing. For starters, your husband, even when supposedly immature, didn't kiss HER. female Right,undoubtedly you didn't say what Tillybops wanted to hear. Soulmate I guess as long as you stay at this site I'll find all of you. I feel like I am hypnotized by the guy. Well, that's all fairly laudible but My piano teacher didnt behave like his normal, reserved self and he made suggestive comments to me. I rather throw it all out in the openbe honestapologize for my mistakeand be ready for the consequences. I like the soft smooth touch of a woman and her sexy smell while iam kissing her with passion, if there is a romantic connection it's even better. End of story. Not sure how anyone can say they're "certain" he doesn't need to know, given the fact that he made his own standards and expectations perfectly clear on that score, back when he himself was the 'victim' of a come-on. But there's a psychological ingredient missing as naturally affects the optimum biological conditions I felt a mixture of excitement and flattery and nerves. We've not made it exclusive yet but we did agree to not see other people at the beginning. 07/12/2015 22:05. 4 days ago. I know true remorse when I see it. Again - your choice. Ill bet you got drunk on purpose because you wanted to kiss him/her.. In a way you are trading his peace of mind for yours, do you really think that you will accomplish anything by doing that? Because guilt typically occurs in "micro-bursts" of brief signals, we often underestimate the rather significant role it plays in our daily lives. I feel sorry for the visually impaired but that doesn't mean I want a blind person flying my airplane and my compassion won't make the flight any safer. It's good that you're willing to forgive,most women would divorce. [2] ..you showed you don't think of he and you as a team by sharing all information pertinent to the relationship; Please tell me I will stop feeling like this. That's a long time for kissing. A number of years ago, while I was still married to my late husband, I befriended a guy who was an ace pianist. Wouldn't you? Then you must be doing it wrong. I could list so many reasons why, but instead Ill just list a few. lover. For what possible reason? reader, Angel-lee+, writes (25 October 2005): A Tl;dr: why do I feel guilty after ending things with a guy who grabbed my ass during our first kiss? :p Me, I can't believe committing adultery isn't an actual crime yet. DON'T: Kiss and tell to someone you're kissing. Come join the discussion about love, romance, health, behavior, conflict resolution, care, and more! Later, I spoke to my fianc and he told me he loved me and was sorry. She confessed to loving the experience and enjoyed the thrill knowing she had her husbands permission and he was watching her. But, listen, I don't want to turn this thread into a general chit-chat one. And, of course, cheating always tends to increase during a recession. He also sent me a mean text that said for me to go f myself and to stay away from him. the guy has a long term girlfriend who he lives with and he said she was really angry with him for coming home so late, then he said, look, I think we're good people that completely lost our minds for 5 minutes, and are suffering major guilt for it now, but it will never ever happen again, and I'm not going to say a word to anyone' to which I replied 'neither am I' and he said 'ok, look I'll see you on Monday but this is going to be ok, don't worry, we can move on from this' reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2005): A Reviewed by Gary Drevitch. I kissed another girl while black out drunk, dont remember a thing. Don't feel guilty. We have only been seeing each other for the past two months and I dont want his mind racing with bad thoughts. We've been together a lot of today for various reasons, we've talked a little but as of right now, officially I'm still "thinking things over." You might feel guilty about it the next day, but it wasnt a big deal. You even said it indirectly in your story, when said you decided to get drunk. How Psychologically Conditioned Rats Are Defusing Landmines, The Innate Intelligence Observed in the Dying Process. ;-) (Awlthough, dang naace trah, they-yer, at tryin-a git' me ter disclows mah gendah. I say tell him. I'm not sure if you are trying to be helpful, or just entertaining yourself with your responses. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. He is the best person I have ever met. I didnt hear from my piano teacher for at least two weeks after that. "what the hell where we at?" However most people don't have a commitment that SOULMATE has with her husband that they will be 100% Honest with each other NO MATTER WHAT! After he gave me a drink we started kissing and I felt terrible.He then asked me to sleep with him. Just, why leave yourself open if you don't have to. Where were you hiding it - up your sleeve? I believe that its a good thing to fess up when kissing someone you care about when you drank too much could threaten your existing relationship. Sadly, many people who have a crush on someone else purposely get drunk or get the other person drunk in order to find out if they have any chemistry with each other, and they temporarily forget about the fact that they are already in a relationship with another person. Simone was telling a caller how satisfy his girlfriend. i think OP is using 'kiss' to mean 'more than kiss', but whatever, it was 4 years ago in a rough patch.. everyone here is wrong. And what Simone Bienne said on the love line. Everyone makes mistakes and it's how you deal with them afterwards that is the most important thing. Lol I love you already. in my opinion I don't see why you would feel guilty you did nothing . Yes one should take care of themselves before getting drunk. Don't feel guilty because you are a mom (or dad) and you feel like you need to be spending time with them. My SO and I had been dating two years. Guess what his response was? Own your truth- You did not expect to hear the REAL TRUTH and the RIGHT ADVICE. v5.00a - 0.32607s [RUM] 2023-03-03 02:57:10. You can't fake that . I know, I need to start a thread. "but the fact I work with this person and have to continue to work with him. " Whether it's romance, friendship, family, co-workers, or basic human interaction: we're here to help! Now is that thread on this site (people's problems)? Then he kissed me, and I kissed him back. Its more like an excuse for cheating. Then the accusations begin, which night go something like: Why on earth did you kiss _________? Because your significant other doesnt fully believe that you just kissed this person because you were intoxicated. But maybe I should have My thoughts are that he has been persuing her. I thanked him for telling me this and we didnt speak to one another for years. As time elapsed, I realized that I was attracted to him and this began to concern me. I'm really surprised that everyone is saying "It's just a kiss" and to not tell the SO. He never says this so I knew it was something serious. Dont tell me that you and ______ (the girl who was staying at our house for the weekend) are lesbians? I believe, on the other hand, that if you got drunk and kissed someone because you were drunk and you had no feelings for the other person, there is no point in confessing about that kiss because a confession could cause trouble over nothing. Once was after we'd had a bit of a heavy talk earlier, and the other two were after we dropped one of the little ones off at the grandparents and he started talking about if it gets easier to leave a child (ie when you have weekend contact and you have to drop the child back off at the end of it.). I don't know if he wants to still be friends with her on FB or not. A female reader, anonymous, writes (24 March 2006): Hey sweetie my Name is Jilian I have a boyfriend as well and we have been dating for 3 months, I have had past relationships that have gone on for 11 months, I have cheated on my past boyfriend andi felt so terrible andi was in the same situation as you are, sweetie i know how you feel. Youre just using the fact that you were drunk as an excuse. What should I do. He's a nice guy and we get on, but I don't know how I'm gonna face him talk about normal work things. / Houston, turns out I/you/I+You can't have kids the natural way after all, which is no-one's fault; let's try IVF / adopt / foster / console ourselves with the fact we'll always have each other, and the babies of people we know to borrow, and the freedom and greater financial means to please ourselves. I love him so much and feel totally ashamed at what happened over the weekend in what was a drunken moment at at a party.I got drunk and kissed another boy. reader, anonymous, writes (21 March 2006): A Which may not seem like a big deal for some of you. (SK: no, it's just one of those places that's never appealed, holiday-wise, no doubt exacerbated by the fact I don't like long-haul flights for how they literally do my head in (think it's the aircon gas plus oxygen deprivation (don't get me started)) often lasting for a whole week afterwards, which isn't exactly what I call having a nice time.) I'll see you over there. Yes, I think if your boyfriend thinks his girl or boy or whatever is gonna be loyal to them even under the influence. You had too much to drink and you kissed someone who wasnt your boyfriend or your girlfriend. I didnt tell him. As one young man said " time heals" and he's so right. Relationships are about trust, first and foremost. I think my husband will not forgive me. I feel so bad since then. Take it away, expand if you please! Do you think it's better to alleviate your guilt by hurting someone you loved or better to just deal with it on your own? Biological ones. Press J to jump to the feed. Ashley Madison helped things along with extramarital affairs. But now he has begun university and I trust him with everything but I keep thinking of what I did. Which probably makes you wonder why I came here in the first place. Why stab your partner in the heart, just to see if the relationship will still survive? Your significant other might get very angry about this, but I believe it depends more on whom you kissed rather than on the fact that you kissed someone else. I kissed another guy while drunk. reader, anonymous, writes (19 August 2006): A There was a lot of biting and groping going on, because, you know, the guys were giving it their best shot. I was heart broken, and even though he said he immediately pulled away, and we stayed together and over time forgot about it, I remember feeling so uneasy every time I knew he would be in that girls company. team swish aau basketball, dave portnoy brooklyn square pizza,